‘You can’t change the past” is a saying that I’ve begun to wholeheartedly disagree with. It’s 2017 and as we, as a society and culture, evolve so must the paradigms we embrace. Shifting paradigms is no small task although not everyone is active in the change process, there certainly are those “rebels” that start to shake things up a bit and make us start to re-evaluate not only how we think but how we function and how systems and structures are organized. I certainly consider myself one of them. So here’s some food for thought. What if you CAN change the past? What does this mean for your self-esteem, your relationships, and your future goals. Here are three ways that you can shift past the past!
1. Essential oils. Say what?!? Yes. There has been an ongoing debate when it comes to finding the cause of psychological and mental/emotional issues. Is it nature or nurture? Nature is what you are born with, your genetics, your DNA. Nurture is your environment including caregivers (which by the way, if they are biologically related to you, have the same DNA) and how they nurture you or don’t nurture you as you grow. This also includes lifestyle choices such as diet and exercise. Science has primarily included, as least in the mental health arena, that it is a combination of BOTH nature and nurture which allows for the expression of illnesses or dysfunction. Even so, many people operate under that premise that something is “in my DNA” and therefore I cannot change. They resign and make no efforts at change. Well, there’s another little area of science called Epigenetics and in this field of study we learn that we CAN change our DNA or at least which programs get turned on or turned off. More accurately, we can change our RNA. Cells replicate all the time and in this process of cell copying, changes can be made so that the expression of our genes can happen differently. Therapeutic essential oils have the ability to permeate cell membranes and be the catalyst for positive gene expression. I’m not a scientist nor do I claim to be so the particular nuisances I can’t verbalize at this time, but this I do know. We don’t have to be a slave to the negative expression of our genetic makeup. In this, we are freeing ourselves from the past and ancestral DNA that no longer serves us (and maybe never did). We have the ability to change EACH AND EVERY CELL in our body and the past memories that those cells carry that weigh us down (like traumatic events). Science has already confirmed cellular memory as a valid thing and more and more evidence is being shown how the body can hold onto experiences (not just the mind). By using Young Living Essential Oils regularly and consistently over time, they can literally change the past and how you experience the future. When you apply Young Living Essential Oils to the body or breathe them in, they permeate every single cell in your body! Some can also cross the blood brain barrier and can effect real change in the brain and we all know how important the brain is!
2. Long Distance Reiki. When I began to study Reiki in 2012 is really when I really started to embrace this idea that we can change the past. We learn about energy and physics in school but who the heck remembers that? It was only as an adult that I started to really think about time and space and the illusions that follow. Einstein (and Tesla) stated that energy doesn’t know time or space. We think of time as linear because we need certain concepts to serve as guide posts or organizers for every-day living. But in true true reality there is NO SUCH THING AS TIME. I know, it’s terribly hard to wrap ones head around this and it would really blow your mind to try and imagine that everything is happening simultaneously (but that’s a theory too). But back to Reiki. You may have heard people saying, “Send Reiki” or requesting that Reiki energy be “sent”. Reiki is universal life force energy or pure loving energy from Source or God (or whomever you believe in as a Higher Power). The idea is that energy can be delivered to any point in time, as energy cannot be created or destroyed. So Reiki can be “sent” to the past as transmitted through thought or by flow, if you will, to past events. The intention is usually to heal a past trauma or conflict or to send love to a situation that didn’t go as planned. This energy can also be sent to heal others who have suffered in the past. I think you get the idea. At first, it sounds bizarre and perhaps “crazy”, maybe even like fantasy….but isn’t everything! From this technique the energy is shifted, allowing for a different expression of the past to show itself.
3. Change Your Story! Here’s a good one. Another thing humans do quite often and quite well is create stories around experiences they have. This is another way for us to organize and make sense of our world, this is especially true since we rarely have all the facts in any given situation and even if we do, it is only OUR facts (not all the facts). When I work with my clients and students I help them to look at things from another perspective and often I encourage a spiritual or higher perspective. When you can begin to extract lessons from a painful event or “bad” relationship etc., things start to look and FEEL different. It’s not so much as the events of the past changing but more so, your relationship to the events of the past change. Your perspective changes and so your feelings become different. Changing the story of a victim to a survivor is one of the most profound ways to help a person begin to heal from the past. Thoughts and beliefs shape our self-image, our image of others and of the world. When we begin to let go of old stories which make us feel yucky and create new ones that help us to feel more empowered, we are shifting away from our old selves and give the past a run for its money!
For a super duper power punch...DO ALL THREE!!! This is where HUGE transformation happens in a short period of time and all of these things work in conjunction with one other. Let’s come up with a quick plan for you to do this...
Materials: Quiet place, Young Living Essential Oils, Essential Oil Diffuser (optional), Journal, Pen
Here’s the plan:
Carve out a chunk of time for yourself in a peaceful place (could be your bedroom).
Get relaxed by taking some deep breaths and inhale Frankincense oil (or any set of oils you choose) or have the diffuser on.
Think of a past even that you would like to change.
Send Reiki Healing Energy to this event. If you are not trained in Reiki – send White Light to all parties involved. See, in your mind’s eye, the event and let the light go to that place/ those people.
When you are done, get out your journal and write the “new story” make sure to include lessons that you’ve learned from this situation and how it has helped you to grow. If you cannot get to this place then simply write out what you need to let go of that doesn’t serve you.
Continue this process every day until you have had the change that you wish to see.
Essential Oils that are great for this are: Forgiveness, Acceptance, Trauma Life, SARA, Believe, Humility, Faith, Surrender and Highest Potential. You can apply them to the back or your neck, over chakras, behind your ears and/or diffuse. To order Young Living go to: http:yl.pe/77x
For Information on Reiki Training email: Holistic_Hairston@yahoo.com .
Disclaimer: We only endorse use of Young Living Essential Oils. We do not recommend using any other Essential Oils in the way that we describe for your health and safety. Essential Oil companies are not created equally and use of oils that are not pure can result in harmful effects.
A Therapist's Letter to Her Son
When I first had you, I thought I’d get you through childhood and adolescence unscathed, perfectly whole and extremely well adjusted. In other words, you wouldn’t need psychotherapy. I was wrong. My general philosophy about life is that we came here, to Earth, to learn lessons. I still believe this. It’s multiple lessons by the way (with perhaps a core), but you can’t just learn a lesson. There has to be a catalyst! You need THINGS…you need “stuff” to learn lessons. And perhaps not all lessons are unearthed by painful emotions but some are. Love and unconditional love are the most amazing teachers for sure but there are less liked teachers that are still damn good at what they do. Who am I to judge who is more effective and for which student and for which lesson being taught? I’m not qualified to speak on that. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’d rather us all learn every single lesson EVER from love and compassion and understanding but it seems that time isn’t right for that yet. They are still calling in sick some days and maybe just don’t even show up at all with no advanced notice. The show stills goes on though. I’ve learned many wonderful albeit painful lessons from rejection and sadness per se. Anxiety and depression are….bitches but man do they drive points home and make you study on the weekends. As your mother I want you to be happy all the time, trust me. I do. I’ll do anything (within reason) to make that happen. But this is the truth….I’m not perfect. I too have “stuff”. I acquired some “stuff” and I bet I came here with some “stuff” too. I’m working on it though and I’m showing up to every class every chance I get but some lessons are harder than others for me. Whatever I haven’t dealt with yet, you inherit…so, I’m sorry. That’s what happens, some stuff gets carried over to you. I hope you’ll forgive me (that’s a lesson by the way) with ease and remember that I did my best at any given moment with whatever I had at the time. I hope you’ll know that I never settled for “good enough”. I always strive to do better but know that I’m slow too. I’ve yet to pass the Instant Manifestation of Miracles Class. No, that’s not true….I had you. It’s the How to Make Shit Happen Super-duper Quick So Everything in Your Life is Perfectly Balanced and Wonderful Class that I haven’t passed yet. I have a feeling we might be taking that one together in about 20 years. I love you. That was never a class I had to take (and some people do, no judgement). My beautiful friend, Gina Califano, had told me that you children pick us because we will give you the RIGHT baggage of crap that you’ll need to work through in this life to get exactly the lessons you need. It sucks but it’s profound at the same time. Perfectly orchestrated by our Creator (who sometimes we damn to hell for all of this “stuff” we were given)! I plan on downloading as many lessons as I can inside of that magical brain and heart of yours to speed up the learning curve…If you’ll let me, that is. We might have to sign you up for the Stop Being Stubborn Class for <insert astrological sign here>. Jesus. Help me out sometimes, kid. But here’s the real things I want you to know besides I was wrong and you should forgive me in advance for messing you up…don’t ever stop signing up for your own classes. You are your life’s purpose. The mission is YOU and the unfolding of YOU. Keep learning about yourself through life’s experiences and people you’ll meet along the way. Never stop questioning and thinking and discovering things. Be a scientist of the self. Be a Jedi Master (I never watched Star Wars so …I don’t know if this is really the correct analogy, but it feels correct) of the self. Fulfill your dreams. Work hard. Love yourself. Forgive yourself. Have fun. Life is short but good (just like your mom). Perhaps if I keep working on my “stuff” and you keep working on your “stuff”, I can have unscathed, and perfectly well-adjusted grandchildren, who won’t need psychotherapy at all. No pressure though. Love you!!!!
Love Mom xoxoxoxo
You may have heard about all the wonderful benefits of essential oils for your physical body. In fact, far too many people ONLY talk about the physical benefits. Don't get me wrong ...I'm totally guilty of this at times too, mainly because it's TRUE. I've seen and experienced tremendous positive results at the physical level from using Young Living products and oils. From a metaphysical standpoint, however, every physical issue or concern is associated with a mental/emotional imbalance or blockage. The theory says that unhealthy emotions or ways of thinking (they go together by the way) actually precede physical discomforts. As a mental health clinician and a spiritualist I LOVE and endorse this theory. On a daily basis I am witness to how negative emotions and thought patterns have a detrimental impact on physical health, whether that's the result of exaggerated stress responses or unhealthy eating patterns, lack of exercise or a whole host of things. Subscribing to this viewpoint, wouldn't it just make a sense to address the underlying issues, if nothing else, then to just FEEL better? Here are some things to consider.
#1. Smell. I used to think aromatherapy was for "hippies" (I can use that term because I'm one of them...don't judge me) and was a crock - a scam - a waste of time. That was, until I started doing a little research. When you smell something the molecules of the substance travel to the olfactory bulb in your brain, then to your limbic system. Your limbic system is where all of your memories and emotions are stored. This is why smelling something can bring you right back to a time and place in your past. This part of your brain only understands SMELL. It doesn't really understand words. Can you believe that? What this means is, that you can proactively use certain aromatics to shift the way you feel and change your relationship with memories. Now, you don't want to just go around inhaling anything! Even things that you may THINK smell good may not necessarily be good for you. I'll use gasoline as an example. Need I say more? So the idea is to use your sense of smell and to inhale substances that are GREAT for your body. Pure. Natural. Nontoxic. Here's where essentials oils come in !
#2. Consistency. As a trauma therapist, it took me quite some time to actually admit that I had suffered my own traumas. That realization has always been just under the surface for me but once admitted I bought a bottle of SARA oil. I applied it several times a day over my Sacral Chakra (lower abdomen just below your belly button). I honestly wasn't expecting very much to happen but it smelled just divine and I loved putting it on. Just the act of applying oils sends the message out that you are ready for healing and positive change. You are setting an intention! So, I used SARA oil for about 3 months and during that time several memories from my past came up but I didn't have any real emotional attachment to them. Some, I had actually forgot had even happened but obviously some part of me was holding onto it. During those 3 months, I felt like my traumas were being gently released from my system. I can't tell you scientifically what happened but I can tell you that I believe the cellular memory of my negative experiences dissipated. All very gently and exactly as I would have wanted. After SARA oil, I moved on to Inner Child and Release and Surrender. I really made a commitment to using the oils on a daily basis to help me work on the emotional layer of myself.
#3. Liberal Use. Ok. Here's another confession. During many oils classes I've stated, "You don't need to use a lot of oils. You'll probably only use one or two drops at a time." While this may be true SOME of the time, it certainly isn't true for me MOST of the time. I may use 1-2 drops of a particular oil for a particular issues but I also use anywhere from 5-20 oils a day depending on WHAT is going on! See, the oils work synergistically and the more the merrier but it's more than that! What is your goal? My goal is to not only feel better but to DO better and to BE better. Let's talk about vegetables instead of oils. If you want to have a better diet and have more energy, what will bring you this result? Do you just eat broccoli once a week? Do you eat 3 carrots every month? Sounds funny and ridiculous, right? We know the answer is NO. You’d have to eat a variety of vegetables and probably throughout the day to have more energy and to feel better. What about the gym? Can you expect to lose ten pounds going to the gym once in a blue moon? Probably NOT! You’d have to make a commitment and be consistent in your fitness plan to reach your weight goal. Using oils for emotional health is really no different. If you are wanting to feel better emotionally then you have to do more than the bare minimum. So I said to myself, what if applying essential oils is VITAL for my self-growth, for my success, for healing and for prosperity. I've come to know that it absolutely IS vital. I'm radically different, in a positive way, than I was three years ago just from using these products. I think differently. I feel differently AND...I'm WAY more empowered. So I oil up every morning, every night and when I want to throughout the day with multiple oils because one oil just isn’t enough for the results I want.
The bottom line is this, if you think YL Essential Oils are just for physical discomforts you are missing the bigger picture and totally missing out on some HUGE life changing stuff! These oils, unlike herbs which are dried and lacking full life force, are liquid and alive! They contain a living intelligence and consciousness, making them amazing tools for emotional transformation and consciousness expansion. Just like any other change agent, you must commit to using the oils regularly as a ritual or a practice. For sustainable positive change, it really is about lifestyle change. There's no getting around that! I challenge you to spend some time in reflection to take inventory of the emotional issues you want to address (and your personal goals) and to start to explore YL oil blends that will help you release old patterns and propel you closer to the person you are meant to be. Happy. Healthy. Whole. Oily !
The business of Network Marketing is a mental health clinician's dream! This sounds extremely odd of a statement but when you examine what's involved in the industry you begin to realize that the process of growing such a business is nothing short of a very long and very intense therapy session with yourself. In fact, I bet 99% of people "quit" their Network Marketing business (or any business endeavor) just for this reason alone. Now, I'm not saying it's right or wrong to quit. There's no judgment here. Just as it's neither wrong or right to be in therapy your whole life (some will argue this point, I know...but work with me). There are some people who choose to be in therapy for a majority of their life, not because they have some great "mental illness" but because they simply want to get better. Become better versions of themselves. It's the small percentage of people who want to be self-actualized and what a beautiful thing that is. In two short years after starting my Network Marketing business, I've become a better version of myself. Here's how...
#1. It changed my relationship with Abundance. Before Network Marketing I had a million misconceptions about what it meant to have money...a lot of money. Thinking about acquiring a large sum of money actually made me anxious. Sounds terrible doesn't it? Sit for a moment and think about getting a $20,000 check in the mail...what feelings does it bring up for you? What would you do with it?!? Specifically, what would you do? See, we are so used to just going from check to check to pay bills and obtain the necessities, that we have yet to create a real plan, in our minds (and on paper) for how exactly we would use money as a tool for progress. In fact, most people say that if they win the lotto, the first thing they would do is give some away to family and friends or spent it on fancy material things. MOST people do not say, INVEST and pay off debt. It's shocking to me now considering what I have learned. This is exactly why most lotto winners end up broke a short time after their winnings. Their financial situation changed but their mindset did not! I believe my anxiety came from the thought of having more responsibility. To acquire a large sum of money is a large responsibility. You are being entrusted with it, as you are entrusted with other gifts in life. It now becomes your job to ensure the proper allocation and use of it. Thinking about getting a $10,000 check in the mail also raised issues about being "spiritual". How many of us have heard the sayings money is the root of all evil or rich people are evil? How about the meek shall inherit the Earth or "money doesn't grow on trees"? No wonder most of us are down-right AFRAID of money. AFRAID, I tell you! So how can you really attract something that you are afraid of? You can't! Now, you may attract SOME of it. The some that you absolutely need (and that number is different for all of us) but not the rest that will make you financially abundant. So there was a lot of work I had to do to get out of the fearful mindset and into the abundance mindset. This was not an overnight thing. It was a process like so many other things concerning the progression of the self. The first step was to really LOOK at my fear. I had to really be honest with myself about the dialogue I was having concerning money. It felt like a punch in the stomach since I didn't believe I was really fearful of anything. I mourned my old ways of thinking. In adopting a new mindset you have to GIVE UP your old one and no matter how outdated and unhelpful your old one is, it's familiar and hard to let go. After the mourning process, it was game ON. I entered into a new phase where I began to re-train my mind. Now, anyone can do this in any area of their life. I started with BOTH the conscious and unconscious minds. I wrote out what I wanted my relationship with money to look like and read it daily. After a while, the new script had been memorized and internalized as new truth. I worked on my subconscious mind (the trickier of the two) at night right before bed. I found an awesome abundance meditation (I'll post here for you to use if you wish) that I would listen to while falling asleep. This started to chip away at the underlying fears concerning financial progress. In my opinion, it is VITAL to work on both parts of your mind, especially the subconscious. So much of what we do is controlled by the beliefs embedded in this part of our minds. To really get control of it, you have to go in through “the back door” so to speak. Your brain is still taking in information as you sleep and so listening to material during this time will start to re-program your beliefs.
#2. I became more financially fit. This goes along with number 1. As I studied my mentor and the masters in the industry I found out very important things concerning how they used money. Before they gave a dime to anyone else, they paid themselves FIRST! A percentage from every check they got went directly to THEM. I started with 10% and put it into a separate savings account which I now call my "Wealth Account". In the words of many mentors, "It’s not how much money you make, it's how much money you keep." So, this is an important practice whether you make $10 an hour or $700 an hour. It's the ritual of paying yourself first that begins to shift how you feel about money, yourself and the world. Robert Kiyosaki, explains this in his book Rich Dad Poor Dad. His rich dad told him that paying yourself first does not mean to neglect your bills. It means that no matter what bills you have, pay yourself first and if you need more money to pay your bills then you will find creative ways to do so AFTER you've paid yourself. This is really the first step in a series of steps to becoming financially fit but it’s an important one. The majority of people I talk to do NOT do this. They pay bills first and then spend what’s left. That means, they have nothing left to save and are not investing in the future. I know I was in this boat too, even when I was fully employed and making decent money. I was STILL living check to check with nothing to show for it and no savings accumulated. Don’t say I didn’t tell you! Start NOW.
#3. The ways in which I can help people have expanded. As a little girl, I always knew my mission was to help others. I wanted to do that on a BIG scale. Yes, I wanted to save the world! As I grew older, my dream of being able to help massive amounts of people (and especially children who were suffering) diminished. While I pursued a career in healing and helping others, I still had a small desire to do more. I never imagined that starting a Network Marketing business would allow me to do just that. I've been able to help hundreds of people versus a few dozen in two years which is quite the difference. In doing that, I've seen a reversal in arthritic condition of my heart's desire. I now have hope again that I can positively impact people's lives on a larger scale. This is intimately tied into numbers 1 & 2. See, having financial abundance means you can give back in ways that you may not have been able to otherwise. Money becomes a tool to transform the quality of lives of others and fund projects that can have a profound effect on generations to come. It enables you to be MORE of who you are and gives you the power to do what you are truly meant to do in this world but BIGGER. Also, as a therapist, my audience is limited. Because of conflicts of interest and ethical concerns there’s just a whole population of people I actually CAN’T help. At least, not by talk therapy. My Network Marketing business has allowed me to offer something of great value to family and friends that I wouldn’t have been able to offer otherwise, including the opportunity to make additional money.
When I started my Network Marketing business I merely saw it as a way to obtain residual income. Now, residual income is super important, don't get me wrong and Network Marketing is a great way to explore that but there is much much more than meets the eye. Would I have expanded my thinking in the ways that I listed above had I not entered this profession? It's debatable but I gather not. Would my vision for more widespread change be reawakened had I not stuck it out or had I not said Yes, I'll try this 'in the first place? Highly unlikely. These are just SOME of the ways that I've grown as a result of my Network Marketing business. Of course, there is much more I can say about how my mindset, attitudes and behaviors have radically changed. A lot more. But my point is this, if you have an opportunity to grow...DO IT. If it's uncomfortable, DO IT ANYWAY. In fact, it’s SURE to be uncomfortable. If you are unsure of yourself, then GO FOR IT. It's is only by going through that we get over that which we are afraid of. We are here to grow and change for the better every day, whether we are in a therapist’s office or staring straight in the mirror in the comfort of our home. For the betterment of humanity, our communities, our families, our children and our selves we have to continue to make progress and work on the self. Find ways to do that. Find things that stir up new found uncomfortability in you so you can rise to the occasion and develop new insights and skills. If you’re in Network Marketing please know that you signed up for on-going psychotherapy and if you’re one of us people who are just plain addicted to the path of self-actualization…let’s DO THIS !